= ] hey i went to a park this week and i sneaked into a cage where there was peacocks Lol i wasn’t suppose to but i did and then security came because someone snitched on me and i got kicked out of the cage = l but i took pictures Lol
I haven’t posted anything in a while so I’m disappointed in my self = / shame on you woman. Anyways last week i weighed myself i was at 207 unfortunately we were moving so I didn’t exercise that whole week but i did move a lot that week so i sweated like never before it was gross. Anyways then after we moved in my uncle came from Florida and i broke my diet and ate things that i shouldn’t have been eating. i think i have gained back some weight i mean i don’t feel it but the number is definitely not at 207 anymore has to be around 212 or so? hopefully its not higher. = l Another thing there’s something wrong with my scale. The light turns on and everything but the number doesn’t show soo i have to buy a new scale i will definitely have one by this upcoming Thursday. OK i started exercising again yesterday soo it’s time to get back on track and stop the bull…WooooHooooo Let’s see umm Wednesday is bring a buddy day at the skating rink so I’m looking forward to it = ] I went to Canobie Lake and got to see Peacocks, they usually let them out of the cage and let them walk around and let you feed them I didn’t know that until that day..so that day they didnt let them out because the place was packed with different schools. I was pissed but that didn’t stop me from getting close to the peacocks. The staff lady that was around the Peacocks cage said there harmless and that they don’t bite so what the hell when She left i OPENED the CAGE and proceeded inside to take pictures it was scary at first and there was 2 peacocks inside but i only got to take like 3 pictures of one because the other was like on top of a branch Any whom somebody snitched on me and security told me to get out of the cage luckily i didn’t get into trouble. It was sooo worth it !!!! hahahaMy sis took a pic of me when the security was telling me to get out but I’m still waiting for her to send the pic as usual…Lol
Because they’ll fuck with you in anyway they possibly can. They’ll lift your self esteem to tear it apart, worse than before. They’ll sleep with you till you’re outdated. Tell you you’re the one and eventually you fall short to a number two. Call you when you’re needed. Want you when no one wants him. Playing games while you sit foolishly trying to stay faithful. Changes don’t happen. He won’t love you the way you wanted him to. He won’t. You want to just let go, but you can’t. You fell in love too quickly. In stupid stupid love. And when he’s gone what ‘s left to do, but shed your tears and hope he comes back to you. He’ll realize, later if not sooner, he had it all. Beauty, brains, class, love. But when he’s done trying out everything there is to try it’ll be too late. You’ll figure it out. You’ll understand. You should mean the galaxy and so much more to any man who “loves” you. If he was absurd enough to let you go, absurd enough to think you weren’t good enough, absurd enough to use you.. then he doesn’t matter. It’s that simple.
Well yesterday was Thursday WEIGH DAY ! I was ecstatic. I didn’t get to post anything yesterday because my internet was down and my phone wouldn’t let me post.= l My sd card all of a sudden got damaged so it erased all my pictures thank god i posted all those pics onto my tumblr soo hooray for me Lol. Ok so my sis took the picture of my weight. Just like Estee said my body wasn’t efficient at losing weight because my metabolism wasn’t up so that’s why i started weight lifting. She said that if I was working out 4 times a week for an hour i should be losing 3 -4 pounds and I wasn’t. I was only losing like 1 or 2 pounds so yesterday when i weighed myself….DRUM ROLL hahaha surprise surprise I was at 207.4 last week I was at 210.8 which means i lost 3.4 pounds AHHHHH yessss!!! Which also means the diet she has me on is working! By September I should be good = ] It doesn’t mean I’m going to stop exercising I’m definitely going to keep going. Just to stay in shape. I was thinking maybe I want to be a fitness trainer now? Well the weather today is much better than 2 days ago. Down here it was 93 degrees i was dying. Lol Now I’m just waiting for my sis to send me the pic of my weight because like i said my sd card got damaged and wouldn’t let me take a photo. Sooo hurry up Diana!! = ] Don’t mind my shity Pj Pants…
OHHHH MYYY Fucking …..LOL It’s like a heat wave here in MA. I feel like I’m being cooked alive. It’s gross. Have i ever mentioned how much I HATE summer ??? It’s Super bright outside , all the sluts are out hahaha and i keep sweating. Thank God I have skating today so I’ll be cold for a good while = ]. i wish It was windy and kinda dark outside.. Aren’t those the best ! Or even if it was raining i would be happy. Unfortunately that’s not the case it’s like a heat wave struck here. So today i finally get to see this guy I’ve been talking about. YAY ! Lol I’m trying not to get to excited about anything but I’m very positive. Anything can happen. My birthday’s almost coming JUNE 24th yeaaaaaa. Ok so I’m happy about my B-day but not happy about the age I’m turning … 19 ewww that’s such an ugly number and I feel like I’m growing up to fast I mean I’m really mature for my age but i don’t plan on feeling older. If thta makes any sense Lol.
So Sunday wasn’t a good day for me, I didn’t eat the way i was suppose to and really felt guilty. However i did exercise Sunday and Yesterday. Yesterday was the first meet with my trainer, Jesus. He’s very nice but very quite. He had me doing a lot and I loved it. I had an Amazing workout yesterday ! I got home and was so energetic but it was late so i showered and went to bed. My workout was to target my abs and my arms and man do i feel it today not a lot but i definitely know what he had me doing is working. For some reason I’m really excited today. I’m feeling confident and positive. Thanks to all the motivating music I’ve been listening to without it I honestly don’t know where I’d be in my workouts. Any whom I talked to one of my really good friends named Bianca and found out she’s doing wrestling. I can’t wait to see her wrestling. she’s one of those type of people that when they set there mind to something are incredibly successful at it. This girl has an immense amount of potential and talent. She’s beautiful, smart, very loyal and a great singer. Her personality will always have a smile on your face. So Like i said I’m eating a lot of protein and didn’t notice everything I bought is organic but It’s way better for me so I don’t mind. I’m going to see if i can practice skating today…. Bye bye Lol
The Perfect Guy…..Yea fucking right there’s no such thing! Hahahaha
Hmmmm A friend asked me about this yesterday night. It had me thinking????? There’s no such thing as “perfect” sooo… Any whom My guy would be honest… Caring…..Fun and respectful. Don’t get me wrong, those words may seem boring but they are key in any relationship. A guy that takes charge and knows what he wants is very attractive in my eyes. One that is doing something in life , one that wants to go somewhere in life. A guy that knows when to be serious and when to just laugh at things. I want a guy that can make me smile all the time. He has to like the same music as me haha. No I’m kidding but it would be nice. Physically I’m not into those tall bulky bitch guys. Lol What we call “pretty boys”. neither am i into “gangster” guys or show offs that think yea I’m cool. I like scrawny guys almost dorky i guess you can say. Lol not like over the top skinny but somewhat like that. Those truly know how to treat a girl right. About 5 or 6 months ago i was really into this guy and i gave my all to him. At first i remember he told my brother he was in love with me and i was kinda creeped out haha and he would always beg me to give him a chance and one day i did. I met him on my 16th birthday and at first it took him a while to make me believe in his words but eventually i gave in. It didn’t last a long time but we ended up being really great friends until he started thinking of himself as a prize and started acting like an asshole. He always doubted me almost didn’t believe in me and gave off a vibe like you will never reach up to my standards towards the end of our friendship. He’s white ( I LOVE white boys Lol not to be picky but white is my personal preference) I was in love. Time passed and he started ignoring me so i just lost all hope and respect for him. So I hate you _ _ _ _ _ ! In “what today feels like ; 24” i posted about this guy I’m really interested in. It hasn’t really gone anywhere because I haven’t seen him yet but I’m staying positive. = ]
Yesterday i went to the gym for a fitness evaluation. It went good, i showed Vic my weight journal and she was impressed at the fact i had lost all that weight by myself. Now why did i go in the first place? i need to get TONED. I’m loosing weight but my body isn’t really hard and i don’t want to loose all the weight and end up staying all flappy hahaha. So as of today i have a food entry journal that i have to bring to my trainer on Monday. Yes , I have a trainer named Jesus. His bio said his specialty is sports fitness so of course i went with him. As you know I skate so I want to become better at the sport. Now my diet/exercise plan is eat a lot of proteins and my trainer wants me to start weight lifting. I can only take 1500 calories in everyday which is good because i usually don’t take in a lot. She calculated everything and said in order for me to get that toned body i just need to loose 47 more pounds. YAY ! haha and better yet her estimated time for me to loose that weight is 3 to 4 months. I’m really excited and I look forward to starting. The Huge plus side is that she said I’m only 18 so It’ll be a piece of cake for me. Hooray = ] The downside? Vic said I will not see the numbers going down on the scale but i will see a lot of shrinking. The reason I won’t see the numbers going down is because my body currently at the moment isn’t efficient enough to burn off calories. Vic told me that if I’m exercising 4 times a week for an hour and I’m still really young, I should be loosing 3 -4 pounds every week and in my case that hasn’t been happening. Well I’m really excited everything seems to be going good for me. I’m staying positive about everything. Ohh Yea So I kinda have a crush on this guy , not crush but I really want to get to know him. He seems like a really good guy and he’s cute. The only thing is he’s a couple years older than me. I mean I don’t mind but maybe he will. I saw him last week and his smile just melted me away and i got butterflies in my tummy.Lol I haven’t felt like that in a while. Guys just haven’t been catching my attention lately and for some reason he has. There’s just something about him.He seems different.I think he likes the same things i like, well so far i know he likes the same kind of music i like. I really want to get to know him but don’t know if i should make the first move or just wait for him? Can’t say anything else about him otherwise It’s going to give it away. ( who he is) hahaha. Anyways i have a lot to do so I’ll Tumble later =: )
Yesterday as i sat at the dining table i noticed a certain glow about my mom. I couldn’t stop staring at her. She looked so beautiful. She always does but yesterday there was something different about her. Her dark black hair , her pale white skin and that purple almost pink lipstick she had on. As i looked at her the energy around her was so strong. Just by looking at her you could tell she’s independent, strong and intelligent. I tried not to stare otherwise she would’ve asked “what?” She just sat there organizing her papers. At that very moment i realized how precious my mother is to me. What would i do if i didn’t have her? The way she takes charge when i have a problem is amazing to see. She makes her mistakes like everyone does but I love her for it because that right there is showing me she isn’t afraid to let us see her make mistakes. I texted her around 1 a.m or so i knew she was sleeping but i couldn’t. She replied anyway and i apologized to her for the way i spoke to her the day before. She of course accepted my apology and we went on talking about other stuff. You know It’s hard to write the way i feel about her because there isn’t words to describe it. Anyone who has a mother should know this. She’s More than just my mom she’s my bestfriend. I’ve shared many great moments with her. Every-time i think of her smile all that comes to mind is warmth and joy. It’s incredible how her smile makes me feel safe and like I’ve got someone in this world that would never let harm come to me. I Love you Ma.
WEIGH DAY! Today i was a bit confused…. I weighed myself like i usually do and was surprised to see that i had lost only 2 ounces ! I exercised 4 times this week and i was very careful with what i ate , so why didn’t i loose my regular 2 pounds? Was it because i started doing an exercise for my Abs, Arms & legs and I’m gaining muscle weight? So i stepped onto the scale a couple of times at first it was at 211.0 like last week i was like wtf? Then i stepped onto it 2 more times just make sure and those 2 times came up 210.8. My scale was on top of a shelve and someone decided to leave the battery inside of it and pile 2 curtain hangers on top of it. Did this have anything to do with it? Man I’m so confused and kinda disappointed. Also It’s my time of the month(OMG i can’t believe i just put that up but It’s nothing new all girls get it.) But I’m not going to let it get to me. i have to continue to do what i normally do and keep in mind that things like this take time and that there will be road bumps on the way to success. As usual My sister being super supportive. I love that girl. Lol Yesterday nothing happened i had guitar and skating practice so yesterday was a long day i didn’t get home until 930p.m.
Lately the vibes I’ve been feeling are pretttty intense. I have had my moods. I do things instantly without thinking and later think about my actions and say wow maybe i shouldn’t have talked to that person like that or maybe i shouldn’t have done that. I can sometimes be selfish and careless towards others feelings. This only happens when i get a really bad vibe from someone like when i meet someone for the first time and they give of that “I’m better than you” vibe. it really pisses me off because no one is better than anyone else. Yea there might be those snobs that get everything handed to them by their parents, those are the type of people that don’t know what it feels like to earn and work for your things. So i do regret some of the things I’ve done lately but unfortunately I can’t take them back. i can only continue to apologize for my mistakes. Hey at least i realize that i sometimes do this. Anyways my point the place i skate at is all white people, I’m Spanish and I’m sized differently than them. As soon as i walk into the place i get a vibe from mostly everyone. A “hate” vibe. Like what are you doing here? Not everyone gives of that vibe but a person can tell when someone is being fake. It makes me mad because other people in general view Hispanics as bad people. News flash All of us aren’t the same. The problem with my race is that they don’t want to do anything productive with their time. To those life is about Looks, Money and Having Fun. Most of the people i see in the city i live are always out partying, people that have so much potential to do something better with time. I’m not saying No partying and just work but partying ALL the time ? come on people. If that’s the way your going to view life then i can honestly say your life is going nowhere. Our world needs to stop all the hatred and just be open to things. It’ll make our planet a better place.